Archive for Whispers

Are We Free?

Are we free? to choose? to live our life the way “we” want it to be?

Causality.
Everything has a cause. Everything we do has a cause. When we choose, our choices our bound by the intricate details of causes. I am writing this because I have been thinking about this topic for awhile because I have watched Matrix again and I have watched Matrix again because I saw a torrent of it and I saw a torrent of it because I was bored and wanted to look for a movie because… The sentence of life is an endless because.

Are we but dominoes falling as the former falls into us? I have been thinking of this for almost a week now and I really cant find any answer but the obvious one – ‘yes we are trapped in an illusion of freewill’.

Another cause of me writing this is to have closure so that I could once forget it and live my life without thinking of the intricate cause and effects that are happening. The only good effect to think of causality is to somehow prove God’s existence.

~towastesecondsoftimeortobeacauseforsomethingunknown

Piso-Pisong Pagibig

Naaalala mo pa ba ng una tayong nagkakilala? Nakita kitang kasama mo mga kaibigan ko. Pinakilala ka nila sakin ngunit nahihiya pako. Di nagtagal nakilala narin kita dahil narin sa iyong pagpipilit. Naging masaya ako sayo. Sinasamahan moko kahit saan man ako naroroon. Lagi ka nandyan tuwing mga masasaya kong sandali at pati na ang mga sandaling akoy nagdudusa. Ikaw ang aking naging lakas sa mga problema. Ikaw ang naging sandalan kung saan akoy napapahinga. Tuwing tayoy naghahalikan lahat ng problema ay nalilimutan. Tuwing nararamdaman ko ang iyong init ng hininga sa aking mga labi, humihinahon ang aking isip. Kaw ang aking naging malapit na kaibigan. Sinabi kong pagtatanggol kita kahit ano pa ang mangyari. Ayaw nila sayo pero di ko hinayaan mawala ka.

Pero ngayon, pano ngayon? Nalaman ko na ang iyong tunay na pakay. Mangloloko ka. Papatayin mo ko sa iyong panggagago. Mga sinungaling mong sarap na akala mo maganda na lahat pero yun pala sinasaksak ka na sa likod. Oo nandyan ka palagi, pero nandyan ka ba nung sinakal mo ko at akoy muntik ng mamatay? Mahirap magmahal kapag hinde ka pala mahal. Ginamit mo lng ako para sa ano? sa piso pisong pagibig? Nasayang lang lahat ng ginastos ko sayo. Hinde ka pala karapatdapat mabuhay kasama ako. Sinabi ko na ito lahat dati at alam kong pabalik balik ako sayo. Wala ako magawa, mahal kita, pero enough is enough, ika nga nila. Sana lang mawala narin ang aking pisopisong pagibig para sayo at akoy maging malaya na.
Ayoko na. Ayoko na yosi.

~jupi

hahaha ang drama.

dream

i cant sleep
i dream
i dream of paradise
ocean wide blue waters
palm trees to shade
soothing sand
still i cant sleep
then i realize
you are my paradise
without you i cant smile
if i die before you
im sure to go to hell
coz there wont be no heaven

~|:()~

.

tinted black window.

tinted black window
i cannot see it all
darkness, the demons & shadows
creeps above my wall

higher & higher they come
darker & darker the sun

tinted black window
i know it will be my fall
unknown will be my tomorrow
but still ill take heed the call

higher & higher the goal
deeper & deeper I go

I dont care bout you!
I dont care bout me!
when I look through this window
I’ll just cry and bleed…

Bow.

sad

(very old photoshop painting I made. my favorite).

(pinapangit ng wordpress. tinatamad nako ayusin -*-)

~jup

kapatid

bukas na ang salamin
ngunit may kulang parin
pare kamusta ka na?
kailan magkikita muli?
kailan babalik sa dati?
pede pa ba kaya?

ang mawalan ng tunay
nawawalan ako!

chong dude pare!
nandito ka palagi
sa mga kantang naisulat mo
chong dude pare!
kaw na ang may sabi!
dito ang yong mundo!
chong dude pare!
maligo ka palagi
amoy ka hangang dito!
chong dude pare
tulad na ng dati
sana ang ikot ng mundo!

umikot na ng todo
ang kamay sa plato
hanap ka
ang mga tawanan
di malilimutan
HAHAHAHAHA!

sa gabing ito
at sa gabing iba
naalala ka
ang kapatid na nawala

chong dude pare
nandito ka palagi
sa mga kantang naisulat ko

Magic Idea!

[edit] apprentice, magic workstation and card floppers :) ngayon ko lng nakita sori na :p salamat sa nagbigay

No, I don’t have an idea on how to do magic nor does this post have anything to do with magic tricks. What I’m referring to in this post is the Magic the Gathering card game. If you don’t have an idea on the game try surfing it on the net, its really a cool game!

I have learned Magic when I was in highschool and if not for its high prices I would maybe have still played it up to today. The prices for each card reach thousands and building decks will really bottom out your wallet! It was the only problem I saw with Magic and it led me to forget the thought of ever playing it again. It was just discouraging not to get the cards you want because of the fact you just cant afford them -*-

But with this problem I came up with the idea of creating a free lan based Magic the Gathering computer game! If one would create a free game like this, there wont be a need to pay anything just to play Magic! If you think about it, if you have a database of all the cards in Magic and you know all the rules, making the game is very possible! The biggest hurdle would be to get the list of all cards, including their details(mana cost, type, rule text, etc.) but if you would be able to get those list of cards then it would be as relatively easy as making a poker game! Now, I have thought of ways to get those list and it turns out I think wizards.com(makers of Magic) has a search page for all cards. I think with a little bit of expertise in web programming, maybe someone could gather all the cards from this page and maybe export it into an xml file or any kind of format. I would not know how to do this but I think this is very feasible but of course its definitely not easy.

Now if any bored person is reading my blog who knows how to do this and has a lot of free time, maybe you could give life to this little idea of mine. Share your knowledge and make Magic the Gathering enjoyable for me again :) (very unlikely, but its worth a try :p)

I guess it would be stealing and pirating the game, but still!!!! Damn Intellectual property rights things.. -*- haha! Well is it still stealing if the game is freeware? oowweell.. dats ol.

~jup

irgrain

Surfing the net I have come to realize that there are too many people with blogs. There are too many people sharing ideas, thoughts, rants and anything else. They write about their school life, sex life, morbid life, techie life, stupid life, insignificant life, significant life. You name it and chances are someone has written something about it. The internet has become an endless foggy sea of knowledge. It has blurred the line of the necessary and unnecessary informations, overfilled with bullshit and wisdom altogether.

Where will I be? I am nothing but a speck in a sea of sparking neurons. Will I rise? or will I stay afloat? Who am I to fly? Who am I to reach the unlimited eyes? I am nothing but a man, a clone of others, repeating the cycle, a grain in the sands of time.

:(

Suiciding

mother’s crying
and she’s been betrayed
by the useless man
and their wasteful ways

she looks down
and cries on everyones eyes
but stupid blind man
sits and whines
while stupid blind man
drinks blood from her vines

i.. see.. the tears
but im helpless today
i.. breathe.. your breath
yet i choke you with greed

mother’s weeping
and she’s been betrayed
by the useless man
and their wasteful ways

she is burning
from this pain
that stupid blind man
has done to her face
while stupid blind man
lies on his grave

i.. see.. the tears
but im helpless today
i.. breathe.. your breath
yet i choke you with greed
we.. dont know..
we are dying.. suiciding

~flooding rains~
~burning rays~
~we are to blame~

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